Is it crazy to feel this way so soon?

[quattlestrologyy]

Hi!

For the back story, this is someone I met through a mutual friend for a trip we went on last month. We got along very well throughout the trip, getting to know each other and opening up to one another very easily. We suggested going to happy hour when we came home.

I thought nothing of it as I have a lot of friends of guy friends, he has a lot of girlfriends. I reached out to see if he was still interested in happy hour, he said yes and we made plans. I met him at the bar, we had a great time talking and laughing together. Of course, as inhibitions run low when alcohol is involved, I gave into inner desire and ended up being flirty to the point of kissing him. Which is something I've never done before, I usually wait for my crush/partner to make the first move. We ended up going back to his place and hooking up. I had no intentions of kissing this man, let alone sleeping with him when I asked to grab drinks but there we were. Even through that, he was a perfect gentleman. Made sure I sobered up, took me home, and reached out the next day to let me know how much he enjoyed himself and that he wanted to see me again. I felt the same way, so we made plans to go out that Friday.

For a bit of context on the last two days of the trip, he started making very subtle but flirty comments about/towards me. I didn't think much of it, given the environment we were in everyone was very open and friendly. But I guess it stuck to my subconscious when we went to happy hour as I was the initiator of the kiss.

Now here we are 3 weeks later since happy hour and very deep feelings are stirring between both of us. It's been a long time since I've felt so connected yet comfortable with someone. So fast which is crazy. Y'all know I HAD to peep the synastry after the first night and definitely can see how we ended up there.

His moon trines my Mars in a very close orb, obvious sexual attraction there. His Venus is also in my 1st house, along with Jupiter and Chiron.

My moon (chart ruler) trine his Pluto and his venus trine my Pluto are probably the aspects that interest me most as I've never experienced either aspect before and boy can I feel the intensity.

His Saturn is conjunct my descendant by 1 degree and that also is something actively manifesting. We do have obstacles to face together if we want this to work, but he's made it clear if I'm in it for the long haul then he will be too as he could see himself marrying someone like me.

I've been so happy being around him, I crave his energy and he's running through my mind all the time (moon-mercury conjunction? lol)

I've felt very called to address a lot of my ******** since we started hanging out. He's inspired me to heal a lot of my inner wounds and give myself a better life. Chiron conjunct ascendant much?

I worry about the Venus-Uranus opposition double whammy, as things could phase out just as quickly as they started. We do come from different walks of life and have both said we usually date different types of people so maybe that's how it manifests for us.

My moon opposite his Neptune also gives cause for concern. Especially with that being my chart ruler, am I not seeing him clearly? Especially with the Venus-Jupiter conjunction opposite Neptune. As a 12H Venus, 7H Neptune I've learned the hard way not to trust too blindly in love.

His NN in my 7th house and my NN in his 5th house give me hope for the potential of a long-term relationship though. Along with his moon trine my north node. We've both said it feels like we've known each other for a long time. Have I potentially found my person or am I moving too fast/not seeing a red flag? Any other insights are appreciated! Thank you!

 

[waybread]

There is no perfect synastry out there. At the very least your sun-sun and moon-moon inter-aspects indicate the ability to get along and be great friends.

But taking things slow now seems like a good idea. Most relationships start with a "honeymoon" period when both people are on the best behavior. It's more important to learn how you two handle stress or disagreements. With respect and maturity?

 

[quattlestrologyy]

You're right, there is no perfect synastry at all. We have a lot more learning to do of each other for sure, we've both expressed that. I've been in a long term relationship before so I'm all too familiar with waiting out the honeymoon phase and getting the real deal.

I appreciate your time and words!

There is no perfect synastry out there. At the very least your sun-sun and moon-moon inter-aspects indicate the ability to get along and be great friends.

But taking things slow now seems like a good idea. Most relationships start with a "honeymoon" period when both people are on the best behavior. It's more important to learn how you two handle stress or disagreements. With respect and maturity?

 

[katydid]

I enjoyed your post and your interpretation. I agree that you two have some very nice synastry and a couple of concerning ones---which is normal. Here are some notes I have.

You covered the positive aspects very well. I may play Devil's advocate though and address a few that could be troublesome.


Your Merc conjunct his Moon is very good. You really see his emotional flow pretty well and he feels like you understand him. Which is good because males with a Taurus Moon don't like to have to explain themselves too much---'it is what it is' is their internal mantra. 'Take it or leave it because I won't be making any sudden emotional pivots'.

That's probably comforting for your Mercury in Taurus, which wants some emotional stability from a partner.

But here is one of my potential concerns. He has Moon conjunct Mars in Taurus, with his Sun tightly square his Mars. Sun@20 Leo square Mars@20 Taurus.

He has Sun sq Mars and you have Sun sq Mars—but not exact and fixed like his. Yours is a wide orb, in mutable signs and in cadent houses. So much different from his Sun Square Mars in fixed signs, in cardinal houses. You are more flexible, compliant and accepting of change.

in forming apex to his in 4th

He has t-square —Moon/Mars in Taurus opposed Pluto, T- square to his Leo Sun——pretty intense —I can see he is very exciting and attractive. Quite an alluring, powerful vibe.

Grand Square in Synastry chart:
your Mercury/Jupiter natal square forms a grand square with his t-square to the Sun in Leo…So that grand square can be like glue holding together a happy union or a trapped feeling of being boxed in.

So what does mean? How does it plays out. I don't know yet and you two won't know for awhile. At first it feels GREAT----like finding th missing puzzle piece. Finally things feel complete. That big grand square is comforting----at first.

But as time goes on, little things might start wearing on each other. For example----just to look at bad case scenario----YOUR Sun in the 12th Square Mars in Virgo in the 3rd of communication----Since Sun's in the 12th you might not always be aware of how this square to Mars impacts others---but MAYBE sometimes your Gemini self likes to tell others what needs to be done, since you are so good at figuring things out quickly and adapting. It's not a bad thing and many people appreciate it because your Mars/Virgo trines your Mercury and you are reliable and intelligent----but sometimes it may come off as being bossy or critical .

His Mercury is in Virgo, near your Mars, so he thinks he is pretty smart and capable too. So you might need to be aware of not stepping on his toes too much. He has Sun in Leo squaring Mars/Moon. So I do think he might get annoyed or be overly sensitive at times, without you realising it. His Sun square Moon/Mars could describe an overly sensitive reaction to little things sometimes.


You have Saturn square Saturn in synastry. He is several years older which can be good but also could be difficult. You might not always be on the same page. Saturn is goals and ambitions in the outer world. Capricorn and Aries might have some differing aims and goals. I think he might be more restricted or inhibited in some deep ways than you are?

in
Your Cancer Moon is tightly opposed his Neptune /Saturn. I don't know how this will play out. It could be wonderful if he has explored his inner self/his shadow self/his vulnerabilities, because your Cancer Moon could be comforting and healing.

If he has not done inner work/therapy or such things, then he might project some of his internalised fears, resentments upon you and this relationship if things get very serious and committed. How's his relationship with mom? lol

With his Moon being conjunct Mars, squared by the Sun and opposed by Pluto, his mom may have had a rough upbringing and had trouble with men? Not sure how or if it impacted his ability to relate?


Your Venus is tightly opposed his Uranus. I think this one worries me the most.

Could your loving, nurturing feminine nature, which he is so attracted to, and which he purposely brings out in you because he craves it himself---Could it suddenly scare him and trigger his 'flight' mechanism?

IN synastry, Venus opposed Uranus can be strong magnetic attraction which feels so loving but can suddenly end because reasons....


I am not predicting that will happen. I'm just concerned when I see that opposition. You have so much positive synastry. I just want you to take it slow and make sure he is not a mirage. lol.....what is his track record in past relationships?

Does he come in like the knight in shining armour and enjoy the honeymoon phase and then bounce when things get too serious? The Leo aSun so tightly squaring his Mars in Taurus makes me wonder if he gets annoyed and makes excuses to bail if things don't go his way?

You have mutuals friends so maybe keep your ears open and poke around and see what you can figure out about his past relationship patterns.
Nothing wrong with a little research so you are not caught off guard. I don't want to bring you down from cloud 9.

This might end up being a serious, positive relationship....but take your time and feel it out.

 

[user 40363]

Have you done a Composite Chart? That may give you another level of understanding this relationship.

Kate

 

[quattlestrologyy]

I enjoyed your post and your interpretation. I agree that you two have some very nice synastry and a couple of concerning ones---which is normal. Here are some notes I have.

You covered the positive aspects very well. I may play Devil's advocate though and address a few that could be troublesome.


Your Merc conjunct his Moon is very good. You really see his emotional flow pretty well and he feels like you understand him. Which is good because males with a Taurus Moon don't like to have to explain themselves too much---'it is what it is' is their internal mantra. 'Take it or leave it because I won't be making any sudden emotional pivots'.

That's probably comforting for your Mercury in Taurus, which wants some emotional stability from a partner.

But here is one of my potential concerns. He has Moon conjunct Mars in Taurus, with his Sun tightly square his Mars. Sun@20 Leo square Mars@20 Taurus.

He has Sun sq Mars and you have Sun sq Mars—but not exact and fixed like his. Yours is a wide orb, in mutable signs and in cadent houses. So much different from his Sun Square Mars in fixed signs, in cardinal houses. You are more flexible, compliant and accepting of change.

in forming apex to his in 4th

He has t-square —Moon/Mars in Taurus opposed Pluto, T- square to his Leo Sun——pretty intense —I can see he is very exciting and attractive. Quite an alluring, powerful vibe.

Grand Square in Synastry chart:
your Mercury/Jupiter natal square forms a grand square with his t-square to the Sun in Leo…So that grand square can be like glue holding together a happy union or a trapped feeling of being boxed in.

So what does mean? How does it plays out. I don't know yet and you two won't know for awhile. At first it feels GREAT----like finding th missing puzzle piece. Finally things feel complete. That big grand square is comforting----at first.

But as time goes on, little things might start wearing on each other. For example----just to look at bad case scenario----YOUR Sun in the 12th Square Mars in Virgo in the 3rd of communication----Since Sun's in the 12th you might not always be aware of how this square to Mars impacts others---but MAYBE sometimes your Gemini self likes to tell others what needs to be done, since you are so good at figuring things out quickly and adapting. It's not a bad thing and many people appreciate it because your Mars/Virgo trines your Mercury and you are reliable and intelligent----but sometimes it may come off as being bossy or critical .

His Mercury is in Virgo, near your Mars, so he thinks he is pretty smart and capable too. So you might need to be aware of not stepping on his toes too much. He has Sun in Leo squaring Mars/Moon. So I do think he might get annoyed or be overly sensitive at times, without you realising it. His Sun square Moon/Mars could describe an overly sensitive reaction to little things sometimes.


You have Saturn square Saturn in synastry. He is several years older which can be good but also could be difficult. You might not always be on the same page. Saturn is goals and ambitions in the outer world. Capricorn and Aries might have some differing aims and goals. I think he might be more restricted or inhibited in some deep ways than you are?

in
Your Cancer Moon is tightly opposed his Neptune /Saturn. I don't know how this will play out. It could be wonderful if he has explored his inner self/his shadow self/his vulnerabilities, because your Cancer Moon could be comforting and healing.

If he has not done inner work/therapy or such things, then he might project some of his internalised fears, resentments upon you and this relationship if things get very serious and committed. How's his relationship with mom? lol

With his Moon being conjunct Mars, squared by the Sun and opposed by Pluto, his mom may have had a rough upbringing and had trouble with men? Not sure how or if it impacted his ability to relate?


Your Venus is tightly opposed his Uranus. I think this one worries me the most.

Could your loving, nurturing feminine nature, which he is so attracted to, and which he purposely brings out in you because he craves it himself---Could it suddenly scare him and trigger his 'flight' mechanism?

IN synastry, Venus opposed Uranus can be strong magnetic attraction which feels so loving but can suddenly end because reasons....


I am not predicting that will happen. I'm just concerned when I see that opposition. You have so much positive synastry. I just want you to take it slow and make sure he is not a mirage. lol.....what is his track record in past relationships?

Does he come in like the knight in shining armour and enjoy the honeymoon phase and then bounce when things get too serious? The Leo aSun so tightly squaring his Mars in Taurus makes me wonder if he gets annoyed and makes excuses to bail if things don't go his way?

You have mutuals friends so maybe keep your ears open and poke around and see what you can figure out about his past relationship patterns.
Nothing wrong with a little research so you are not caught off guard. I don't want to bring you down from cloud 9.

This might end up being a serious, positive relationship....but take your time and feel it out.

Thank you SO much for such an in-depth response! And for the kind words on my own interpretation!

I appreciate you highlighting the aspects that may be cause for concern down the line. Because of the wide orb I often overlook my own Sun-Mars square. Despite my Sun being ruled by my Taurus Mercury I am very flexible and accepting of change. His Sun-Mars square being so tight and in a fixed sign is something for me to be mindful of moving forward.

My mom has told me in life that I sometimes can come across as a know-it-all or critical, even though that's never my intention and knowing how that may come across, I'll try to reel that in a bit more.

I'll come back with updates about how the grand square plays out depending on how our future goes lol.

He is a bit more restricted/inhibited than I am, the Saturn square is real haha. He's got things pretty established in his life, whereas I'm just about to get my place for the first time, learning how to drive (I'm a late bloomer, I live in a very transit/commuter-friendly city.) My 7H Capricorn is very attracted to his maturity and looks forward to how we can help each other grow but I'd be lying if I didn't say the age difference didn't make me a bit insecure. He's repeatedly expressed that it's not an issue, especially because he wants to have kids. He wants to make sure the mother of his children has a safe/smooth pregnancy and acknowledges the struggles that people may face trying to conceive at an older age.

Surprisingly, one of the first things we bonded over as friends was how we're both in therapy and how much we love our therapists. He sings her praises often, not just to me but to others, and acknowledges that he's had to put in a lot of work to be where he is now. From what I gather he has a pretty good relationship with his mom, he said it wasn't always the best but he doesn't negatively talk about her at all. I want him to feel comfortable with me and know that I'm a safe space. I never thought I'd feel like this about someone again.

The Venus-Uranus opposition is what worried me the most as well. His therapist called him out for entertaining women that he ultimately knew weren't aligned with his goals, pointed out that he usually doesn't make it past 3 months of getting to know each other and called them placeholders. He's told me that he doesn't feel that with me, that he usually doesn't have such intense feelings for people so soon but I'm still weary about it. He's said multiple times that he's here for more than sex/phsyical intimacy and I want to believe him (he's been very eager on introducing me to his friends, I've already met his entire family at his brother's wedding) but you just truly never know. I'll survive of course if things don't work out but I will be crushed.

On our first official outing after "The Happy Hour" a couple of his friends were there. While he stepped away one pulled me to the side and asked how I felt about him. I let her know that things were very early but I did enjoy his company and am looking forward to how things would progress. She was happy to hear that, raved about his good qualities and how great of a catch he is. Our mutual friend also had nothing but good things to say. She said "he's a weirdo, but he's very real." So that gives me a bit of hope.

This could be something really great and I am undoubtedly very down bad about him already lol. But I've learned enough from love to know that I must take everything with a grain of salt and move slowly because heartbreak is real and not everyone is meant to be together forever. If even meant to be together at all.

Thank you so much again for taking the time to reply and analyze our synastry. I'll be sure to let you know how things turn out for us!

 

[katydid]

Thank you SO much for such an in-depth response! And for the kind words on my own interpretation!

I appreciate you highlighting the aspects that may be cause for concern down the line. Because of the wide orb I often overlook my own Sun-Mars square. Despite my Sun being ruled by my Taurus Mercury I am very flexible and accepting of change. His Sun-Mars square being so tight and in a fixed sign is something for me to be mindful of moving forward.

My mom has told me in life that I sometimes can come across as a know-it-all or critical, even though that's never my intention and knowing how that may come across, I'll try to reel that in a bit more.

You have a good mom. lol. My daughter is a Gemini with Mars in Aries and I've had to remind her that she sometimes can come off as bossy---she is like you, doesn't have any intention of being so---but she says she feels so enthusiastic sometimes about a sudden idea that she comes across bossy when she is just trying to be helpful.

I'll come back with updates about how the grand square plays out depending on how our future goes lol.

Yes, please do.

He is a bit more restricted/inhibited than I am, the Saturn square is real haha. He's got things pretty established in his life, whereas I'm just about to get my place for the first time, learning how to drive (I'm a late bloomer, I live in a very transit/commuter-friendly city.) My 7H Capricorn is very attracted to his maturity and looks forward to how we can help each other grow but I'd be lying if I didn't say the age difference didn't make me a bit insecure. He's repeatedly expressed that it's not an issue, especially because he wants to have kids. He wants to make sure the mother of his children has a safe/smooth pregnancy and acknowledges the struggles that people may face trying to conceive at an older age.

Yes, so in many ways it is a good thing for an age difference. It gave him more time to get established and to be really ready for a family. Many guys your age would not really be as ready or able.

Surprisingly, one of the first things we bonded over as friends was how we're both in therapy and how much we love our therapists. He sings her praises often, not just to me but to others, and acknowledges that he's had to put in a lot of work to be where he is now. From what I gather he has a pretty good relationship with his mom, he said it wasn't always the best but he doesn't negatively talk about her at all. I want him to feel comfortable with me and know that I'm a safe space. I never thought I'd feel like this about someone again.

I'm REALLY glad to hear that. His Moon has some powerful aspects and if he and Mom are on decent terms that means they have worked through a lot. And that makes it easier to have a relationship with him.

The Venus-Uranus opposition is what worried me the most as well. His therapist called him out for entertaining women that he ultimately knew weren't aligned with his goals, pointed out that he usually doesn't make it past 3 months of getting to know each other and called them placeholders. He's told me that he doesn't feel that with me, that he usually doesn't have such intense feelings for people so soon but I'm still weary about it. He's said multiple times that he's here for more than sex/phsyical intimacy and I want to believe him (he's been very eager on introducing me to his friends, I've already met his entire family at his brother's wedding) but you just truly never know. I'll survive of course if things don't work out but I will be crushed.

That Is fantastic that you have both been doing therapy work. His T-square to Sun from Mars and Pluto can be very brutal if one doesn't try to unpack it all first. At this point he can use it 'for power and for strength' instead of it being self defeating negative energy.

On our first official outing after "The Happy Hour" a couple of his friends were there. While he stepped away one pulled me to the side and asked how I felt about him. I let her know that things were very early but I did enjoy his company and am looking forward to how things would progress. She was happy to hear that, raved about his good qualities and how great of a catch he is. Our mutual friend also had nothing but good things to say. She said "he's a weirdo, but he's very real." So that gives me a bit of hope.

Sounds good.

This could be something really great and I am undoubtedly very down bad about him already lol. But I've learned enough from love to know that I must take everything with a grain of salt and move slowly because heartbreak is real and not everyone is meant to be together forever. If even meant to be together at all.

Yah, I get it. My daughter is around your age and the struggle is real. lol. She has had 2 five year relationships, but since the 2nd one ended a couple of years ago she has not had such good relationship luck. She is hanging in there though...

Thank you so much again for taking the time to reply and analyze our synastry. I'll be sure to let you know how things turn out for us!

Please do.

 

[duehightlight]

Hi!

For the back story, this is someone I met through a mutual friend for a trip we went on last month. We got along very well throughout the trip, getting to know each other and opening up to one another very easily. We suggested going to happy hour when we came home.

I thought nothing of it as I have a lot of friends of guy friends, he has a lot of girlfriends. I reached out to see if he was still interested in happy hour, he said yes and we made plans. I met him at the bar, we had a great time talking and laughing together. Of course, as inhibitions run low when alcohol is involved, I gave into inner desire and ended up being flirty to the point of kissing him. Which is something I've never done before, I usually wait for my crush/partner to make the first move. We ended up going back to his place and hooking up. I had no intentions of kissing this man, let alone sleeping with him when I asked to grab drinks but there we were. Even through that, he was a perfect gentleman. Made sure I sobered up, took me home, and reached out the next day to let me know how much he enjoyed himself and that he wanted to see me again. I felt the same way, so we made plans to go out that Friday.

For a bit of context on the last two days of the trip, he started making very subtle but flirty comments about/towards me. I didn't think much of it, given the environment we were in everyone was very open and friendly. But I guess it stuck to my subconscious when we went to happy hour as I was the initiator of the kiss.

Now here we are 3 weeks later since happy hour and very deep feelings are stirring between both of us. It's been a long time since I've felt so connected yet comfortable with someone. So fast which is crazy. Y'all know I HAD to peep the synastry after the first night and definitely can see how we ended up there.

His moon trines my Mars in a very close orb, obvious sexual attraction there. His Venus is also in my 1st house, along with Jupiter and Chiron.

My moon (chart ruler) trine his Pluto and his venus trine my Pluto are probably the aspects that interest me most as I've never experienced either aspect before and boy can I feel the intensity.

His Saturn is conjunct my descendant by 1 degree and that also is something actively manifesting. We do have obstacles to face together if we want this to work, but he's made it clear if I'm in it for the long haul then he will be too as he could see himself marrying someone like me.

I've been so happy being around him, I crave his energy and he's running through my mind all the time (moon-mercury conjunction? lol)

I've felt very called to address a lot of my ******** since we started hanging out. He's inspired me to heal a lot of my inner wounds and give myself a better life. Chiron conjunct ascendant much?

I worry about the Venus-Uranus opposition double whammy, as things could phase out just as quickly as they started. We do come from different walks of life and have both said we usually date different types of people so maybe that's how it manifests for us.

My moon opposite his Neptune also gives cause for concern. Especially with that being my chart ruler, am I not seeing him clearly? Especially with the Venus-Jupiter conjunction opposite Neptune. As a 12H Venus, 7H Neptune I've learned the hard way not to trust too blindly in love.

His NN in my 7th house and my NN in his 5th house give me hope for the potential of a long-term relationship though. Along with his moon trine my north node. We've both said it feels like we've known each other for a long time. Have I potentially found my person or am I moving too fast/not seeing a red flag? Any other insights are appreciated! Thank you!

With that pluto synastry the feelings come quick and make u question ur sanity. Dont worry, ure not going mad but ita gonna be intense—whether u guys make it or not. Ull be on each other’s mind constantly