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Ajna

Member
Joined
Dec 10, 2010
Messages
21
Funny email I received. The sender says the word coining event was Mensa sponsored. If it was, this is a chance to be among the intellectual elite". :biggrin:


Take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter and supply a new definition:


1. Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.


2. Ignoranus: A person who is both stupid and an *******.


3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.


4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.


5. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.


6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.


7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high


8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.


9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.


10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.


11. Karmageddon: It’s, like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer.


12. Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.


13. Glibido: All talk and no action.


14. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.


15. Arachnoleptic Fit: The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.


16. Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.


17. Caterpallor: The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating.


Supply alternate meanings for common words:

1. Coffee: The person upon whom one coughs.


2. Flabbergasted: Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.


3. Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.


4. Esplanade: To attempt an explanation while drunk.


5. Willy-nilly: Impotent.


6. Negligent: Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.


7. Lymph: To walk with a lisp.


8. Gargoyle: Olive-flavored mouthwash.


9. Flatulence: Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who’s been run over by a steamroller.


10. Balderdash: A rapidly receding hairline.


11. Testicle: A humorous question on an exam.


12. Rectitude: The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.


13. Pokemon: A Rastafarian proctologist.


14. Oyster: A person who sprinkles his conversation with yiddishisms.


15. Frisbeetarianism: The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.


16. Louvre: A restroom in France.


17. Circumvent: An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

:w00t:
 
This is adorable! I especially love bozone, glibido and ignoranus xD I might say some of these words to other people :)

idk I can't really think of one...

Gaughty- someone who's naughty but cheap.

Ehh not the best!
 
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Yeah I was rotfl when I first read it. :w00t: My favorites are sarchasm, Dopeler effect, and negligent. I'm frequently guilty of this last one!

I will add "sultry" - the act of sulking that leads to make up s**

Not as good, I know. :unsure:
 
Almenack...what happens when you order a round of 'Frenet' at the bar for your mates! [..."ACK"...]


...a testimonial to 'Frenet'!
...another satisfried consumer!
 

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