Life is falling apart

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ScorpAsc5

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Aug 9, 2014
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783
Everything which is important to me, is being taken away from me and I am unable to have any control over it. My mental health has now started to degrade. I am unable to see any way out.

I am severely unhappy with my current job, I have now 10 years of work experience after completing graduate school but they want to keep me as an entry level employee. Kept giving me false promises and keep asking me to have patience and to wait. Some co workers have an easy way out and they easily get promoted/raises even when they spend most of the day gossiping or flirting with the bosses.

I am also stuck here due to immigration. They started my immigration application in Jan 2023 but last week told me (and a few other folks) that due to a clerical error, they missed a deadline and won't be able to proceed further. I have now limited time to stay on work visa and I can't switch to another job either. They have made another promise to help us out in this immigration problem but my confidence in them is pretty low. It would be on the government if they would accept/reject new immigration application.

Being severely stuck at my current work place is impacting my mental health a lot. I try not to but it still hurts me incredibly that why I deserve so low - how did I end in this terrible situation. One dash of positivity tells me to work harder and switch jobs etc but due to strict visa rules, I really cannot change jobs either.

I did fall in love with someone at the workplace but he broke up with me in December - he now engages himself in conversations with other women in the office and I try a lot to not have it impact me, yet it does. His reason to let me go was that I am too demanding romantically and I did not appreciate when he gave me his bare minimum time/efforts.

My family lives in my home country and my mother and brother fight all the time - they call me and tell me how the other person is wrong and how they suffer in life and wait for it to end.

I was happy in 2023. but 2024 was equally unhappy and now since last 2 months, I am getting shattered on my hopes and dreams every day. I have no one to talk to but posting here. Mods can delete it. If one of you sees any hope or anything positive in my life which could bring some peace, please let me know.
 

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Astrologically I see that you are caught by the solar eclipse creating a t square …. in your 6th sq jupiter 9th and neptune uranus 3. So that is exactly what you have. lies and legal difficulties.

The next eclipse later this year, turns it into a grand cross from 12th adding then venus for loss of money.

Therefore It is obvious that you need to prepare for the inevitable. You will face these difficulties irrespective of where you are but given your difficult circumstance the loss will be at least easier to understand and also easier to deal with because it isn't you, its the company wanting to cut employees.

Yes the company is resorting to lies to cut people and cost but take comfort that it is for the best as you were a financial slave. They took advantage of you and used you as a slave. it happens all the time. Its too late now to do anything. The sentiment against immigration is too strong. And with your eclipse it just wont succeed. Best to regroup at home and wait for better times and this time chose a visa that doesnt turn you into a slave.

I dont know which country you are in but if it is US, you will have a few days to leave in your own accord or face a record of overstaying and never being allowed to return. So make sure you understand what happens when that last day of employment or visa comes. And be ready. If you are not ready you best leave and return on a temp visa to sort yourself out. Do not overstay. These are the practicalities you must be aware of that nobody cares to tell you.

With the current sentiment for anti immigration world wide, be ready for return home. This is not becoming a friendly world for outsiders. Do not waste your money. Every major company is cutting thousands. Accept the inevitable. At least you know it's not you or your skills.

As for your family squabbles. It is the way they have of making sure they reel you back home. Either you go home or you become firm and tell them you cannot help them and refuse to talk about their squabbles. Tell them you need only good news, that your life is hard and start dumping your problems on them on purpose to distract them from their petty problems. As soon as they start their story you start with…yes but let me tell you my problem…. yadda yadda. Dont talk about their problem…. talk about yours. You firstly take it off your shoulders and unburden which psychologically helps you to unbottle your worry and secondly stop their squabbles adding to yours.
 
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Hello ScorpAsc5,

even if you are severely tested by the problems that arise, this must lead you to have a passionate impulse in relation to your work. You tend to devote yourself to what you do, this is what promotes the relationship with others...
During the period from the end of January 2025 to the end of May 2025, this will lead you, on the one hand, to a passionate impulse in relation to what you do and the objectives that you want to achieve in relation to your aspirations, and on the other hand you will tend to devote yourself to your objectives in relation to your aspirations. You may be interested in your true union with what you love, while communing with your ideas, and what you want to do while engaging through your way of being. You will tend to attach yourself to your ideas, which will have an impact on you. You will absolutely want to be valued through what is difficult for you to achieve, by awakening your reflection, as well as being at all costs attentive to your own ideas to make them progress, by promoting what pleases you and what you love...

Ecliptique. :)
 
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Transiting Saturn was conj. your natal Mars all of last year. Intense frustration leading to anger, depression, etc. W/ Pisces, you wouldn't know if you're going in the right direction or wrong one, up or down. Confusion.
Tr Neptune has been conj. Venus (disillusionment, lack of clarity, deception via relationships) from Pisces, will still be aff. that area all of this year as it enters early Aries. Use care/common sense w/ relationships.
You have your Jupiter return in July, in the 9th, foreign matters, legal matters, long dist. travel, etc. It goes on to trine natal Mars, which should help reduce restrictions on your feelings of lack of freedom of movement. Psychological sense or physically.
 
Hello scorpio asc5,
Transiting Saturn is currently sextile your natal sun which rules your house of career. Now might be a good time to find a new career.
 
Am I going back to my home country ? I just returned to the US in 2022 after facing a job loss during covid. Why would this universe put me back in the US just to kick me out again ?

If I could, I would have changed my current employer but the immigration rules are tight, I don't have much visa time left and no other company would hire me in this job market with such less visa time remaining.

Because the person who broke my heart is in the same workplace, I am unable to heal properly and strictly. I like to be strict with no communication but at times I have to talk to him - and like friendly co workers while working on the projects.
 
I dont know if you are going to be able to stay or if you are going to have to go….and replan again another visa with another company and return.

unfortunately you are stuck at the wrong time with wrong circumstance.

Why you would fight to stay at entry level and even spend huge amounts to make sure that happens…is beyond me. This is what you are doing to yourself…fighting to keep yourself down.

I would say its best to go home…use your money to find another job …wherever in the world gives you a better higher experience….and stay there for a couple of years….then maybe reapply to return on your own terms.

but you would chose to fight and bankrupt yourself keeping yourself at entry level. ok then. dont complain if you are used.

And unfortunately you have difficult circumstance in your chart as per eclipses pointing to lies and uncertainty. Later in the year …September….this refreshes from next set of eclipses, it points to more of the same plus loss of something you value.

you do have a sextile pluto to venus moving in for next couple of hears pointing to possibility of strengthening of all you value…. but that can go both ways. it can be reconnecting with relatives as well as improving your finances…anywhere you are. it does not by itself indicate a stay or go…just a possibility of stringer fundamentals as to things you value.

The environment you are in, is currently unfriendly and unreliable. Its unfortunate timing. The worst may happen. If it does, be ready.

Either way the next few months is a give and take. On one hand you are hampered on another you are offered ways to strengthen.

I would not advise romantic entanglements in workplaces. It always turns out one of you has to leave. its just not worth it.
 
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Interestingly, your 2nd house ruler is in the 9th house so it makes sense for you to make money overseas but your north node is in the 4th house which seems to indicate your fate is tied to your home country. To make things more interesting you have chiron in the 9th house which would indicate overseas travel can be a wounding experience for you.
 
Hello ScorpAsc5,

even if you are severely tested by the problems that arise, this must lead you to have a passionate impulse in relation to your work. You tend to devote yourself to what you do, this is what promotes the relationship with others...
During the period from the end of January 2025 to the end of May 2025, this will lead you, on the one hand, to a passionate impulse in relation to what you do and the objectives that you want to achieve in relation to your aspirations, and on the other hand you will tend to devote yourself to your objectives in relation to your aspirations. You may be interested in your true union with what you love, while communing with your ideas, and what you want to do while engaging through your way of being. You will tend to attach yourself to your ideas, which will have an impact on you. You will absolutely want to be valued through what is difficult for you to achieve, by awakening your reflection, as well as being at all costs attentive to your own ideas to make them progress, by promoting what pleases you and what you love...

Ecliptique. :)


You always want to be valued, evolve your ideas by knowing how to get them across more calmly, with the need to advance them from what you aim for higher...
More important seems from mid-March 2026 which will concern your activities as well as the interest that will be shown to you. Stay close to what you do, and therefore confident in the future...

Ecliptique. :)
 
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I moved to the USA in 2013 and things were alright for me, I accepted what I was receiving. But then, In 2020 I had a job loss and I had to move back to my home. That was a very harsh time because It impacted my career, stable life and ambitions. I worked hard to emigrate and returned to the USA in 2022 for another job. Now, things are getting tighter for me again that there are boiling chances for me to return to home again.

If I did go back this time, I would not want to return to the USA or live in any other country either. I would get stable and accept my fate.

I am aware I am unhappy since my return in 2022 because of my job - I hate it and I am sure it hates me too. I could not change it because of ongoing immigration petition which they stretched for 2 years and now stopped it. They are now trying to get my a visa through another express entry petition which I do not know would get approved/denied. I do not know. I am in the US for about 1.5 years more. This petition is for me to be able to stay after 1.5 years. I want to change my current job and I think it would make me feel better. I think my manager secretly dislikes me - hardly people are getting promoted.

I assume that I would be happier with my next job - but would I ? I do not know either. I consistently feel that whatever is happening with me since last one year, it's someone else taking decisions for me and I am stuck in a cage accepting whatever is being told/given to me by my employer or life.

If you all think I am returning home again and my stay in the foreign country is done, then it would be done forever. I never could receive what I deserve, I would be okay to stop fighting one day.

I have constantly failed to find someone to love me in all this time. This has made me believe that I am an unlovable woman. I have started to feel very tired of continuous rejections and failures of life.

Thank you.
 
Hello ScorpioAsc5,

I think that the period that is about to open now is more important. You will really devote yourself to what you want to do with a passionate impulse.

The period from the end of May 2026 to the beginning of May 2027 will be more important with an evolution between your activity and your aspirations. Always make sure to keep the best possible union with what you do while showing your commitment...

Ecliptique. :)
 
Its really really a matter of bad timing all round. And also that you are pushung yourself out of a very difficult and very economically and professional abusive situation. career slavery that happens with visa abuse especially in US, is demoralising and wrong. And so is your current situation where you are now abused by the legal system as well. You have wasted 10 years of your life.

you will read that i put you in center of your life because i am a person who knows that we are responsible for our lives. nobody else is. we create our circumstance. we do everything for a purpose. sometimes failure is or severity of some sort, is our purpose in order to learn something. But the chart would support this.

In your case I see a tsquare causing poisonous relationships. and a need for totalitarian control over your life and mind.

but I also see a grand trine and two mini triangles. So you are very talented and could be very successful. . Those far outweigh the aforementiomed difficult configurations. yet you let the meanness of thise strangle your life totally.

I am not going to focus on your poisonous relationships. that venus position is pretty much burnt and trapped. its frazzled to a cinder beyond redemption. Its a string sign that you chose to hamper yourself in this life… coming down to a country as a female by making sure you would nit be trapped in a typical female subserving role by accepting to strangle the venus. but in our society where indoctrination and hormones are both strong…its a hell of an ask to go without. its impossible. so the torture takes a lot of focus and energy derailing you. it is what it is. it will always be. some transit may help for a bit but the torture will always return. and it sure feels so much colder after a few minutes of warmth! its torture.

your pluto opposition sun mercury in fixed signs is what you now use to project this destructive, torturous destruction and major damaging debilitation in your core self. you have projected yourself into this and want it to continue. You are unable to change and dont want to.

you are by nature a highly stable person. both the sun and mercury are well aspected for success. So you should be a very successful person. But you arent. So what prevents you? I think its that you have become attached to a position that is not benefitting you in the least and have allowed the familiarity to entrap you. you have projected power. You were released by the lockdown. But back you went to the same low position. you threw into the mix two scenarios to again release yourself. one was legal and one was a person. in fact its a two in one here. the power of your person now torturing you and the power of the system now torturing you. its in fact all boils down to …..relationships!

going home wont change a thing. you will recreate this.

projecting a sulky child to go home sulk and jail yourself in yet another torturous low level dead end life wont be working with the problem of learning to deal with torturous relationships of crippled venus which represents all that you value …all and every type…and the projected power of control and destruction of pluto over you that you create.

the only way I see is for you to get professional help to learn skills to deal with these two factors…creating or working with power of others over you and all values and relationships.

stay or go…and to where… isnt important. but getting help in india may not be as easy as US and other western countries. And without this help you are stacking the chips against self growth.

if you do go back to india because you want to….dont stay. see it as temporary to rest recover and plan the next step. frankly I would use my savings to upscale skills towards AI. perhaps consider doing a masters degree or even better a phd in AI…or security….at a good western university…findaphd.com… a funded phd pays enough to live on, so using savings would lighten the load a bit. industry loves phd with industry experience!… then go via a good position to another country (that doesnt have the enormous and severe misuse of visas), but really it doesnt matter where…. to gain experience for two years or do post grad research ….to peg you at a high talent level person and then return to US via the right talent visa of a high skilled professional.

Anything else is harmful and making you a victim. Aim high. the sh t will still be around you. you will still project power. you will still be a victim. but at a higher more successful level.

its the best you can do. if you have to be kept down… chose a high level to sit on!

its worthwhile sacrifice to give you the power and options you need.
 
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on the offchance that you would consider upskilling to dial up notch of your life and career with masters or phd…. do it fast before they kill DEI because its advantageous for you.

a masters is tought and is good for career, a phd is open ended, can fail to complete…because its up to you and what you want to do….and is really for you not necessary career….but its damn good for visa success because it immediately kicks you up to talent level!!

if you cant get into a rated unies in US, consider UK who specifically has good reputation for education. you are most likely to succeed to completion with US or UK. they both specialise in removing blocks to completion successfully. Amd chosing a good supervisor for phd is absolutely mandatory. a phd can be killed by conflict with supervisor. anywhere else seems to struggle and maybe even intentionally obstruct students.
 
your progressed moon is conjoing Saturn, by the end of this year, p. moon will move out of saturn's influence and you will be out of the woods, cheers!
 
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