Do you mean the meaning of TRUE B.M Lilith (h13 in astro. com charts) or the true meaning of MEAN B.M. Lilith. Both were transiting Leo to be conjunct natal Pluto and South Node around the year you were born.
Neptune was also sextile Pluto, which could have an influence upon the realm of ' inner imagery/fantasy'
As far as I can check, there were several planets forming grand crosses in the Fixed signs during a similar period, so the planets involved on your particular grand cross would add their influence in how the BML meaning(s)inwardly operate and can surface to become part of one's conscious awareness. BML can feel to be 'the missing piece' that makes one complete. When in harsh aspect it seems to say a lot regarding 'the inner child', and a 4th house position would enhance this.
What has been observed with natal BML in Cancer or the 4th house is 'a link' to that which is thought of as extinct, non-existent, or no longer physically functioning. It can have an association with 4th house inherent factors and traits. Part of the fixed cross is Taurus. Jupiter was in it and formed part of a fixed grand cross. Jupiter is one's belief patterns, and Taurus is the sign which would seek physical tangibility of whatever was felt to be so. BML cannot provide that, as it is a purely inner experience that the person simply believes/understands/ac
knowledges to always have been there, and to be true without knowing why (Pluto). There may be a necessity to overcome unwarranted fears in delving into the unknown
to seek answers.
The Pluto in Leo generation were the first to undergo the individuality of being one's self. The Sun sign's influence will be important in achieving it.
BML may mean experiencing those obstacles that appear to stand in one's way.....and/or experiencing the difference between excuses and reasons to overcome them. The right to the identity to be myself rather than the child, friend, spouse of whoever is very strong with BML in Leo.
BML in 4th has also found associations with terminations of one kind or another, and the cravings, yearnings, and 'if only' that remain. In some cases it has been observed to represent the figment of imagination of 'the (lost) child that never was', yet who lives within to go through the inner created passage of growth that doesn't exist in reality.
'Rebirthing' can be another experience of the 4th house BML. The deep inner desire to know how, what, where it all began, and/or to explain the deep inner feelings one carries within. With Pluto, hynotism can work, although Taurus might not fully cooperate; much too grounded.
Saturn is 'the baggage', isn't it? At its best, BML will aid in DISconnecting from it to get rid of it.
Just a few of many possibilites to consider, of which TRUE BML will show through wisdom of experience just how much of 'a wise (wo)man' the individual has become.
“
The right to the identity to be myself rather than the child, friend, spouse of whoever is very strong with BML in Leo. “
That ^^ speaks to me.
When my Solar Arc Sun got involved in the my natal fixed squares, and was squaring the Pluto/BLM from the 7th house, I took a road trip with my musician boyfriend, and ended up moving to Los Angeles, 8 hours away from my family.
Until then I had been closely connected and involved with my very large extended Irish Catholic family. Huge assortment of siblings, cousins, aunts and uncles, Grandparents, etc etc. all living in the Bay Area and celebrated everyones birthdays and holidays etc.
I loved my big family. But I always felt like everyone knew everyone else’s business and I couldn’t really explain myself—couldn’t express where I saw my life going—it didn’t fit in with most of my cousins and siblings, who were going the more traditional, suburban route.
Choosing to become an Astrologer and teach classes at the Metaphysical Bookstore was hard to really explain without awkward silences. Living with a singer in a band, and touring with them, also not well received by my large protective family.
Lots of incidents during that period of ‘living with the band’ would fit well into the description of Black Moon Lilith meets Pluto and the South Node. in Leo, in house of home…*blush*
So I did set off to ‘find myself, which required me to free myself from family restraints and expectations.’
“
When in harsh aspect it seems to say a lot regarding 'the inner child', and a 4th house position would enhance this. “
My inner child was gravely wounded as a very young girl. After my parents divorced suddenly, my mom moved back to her home, with us 3 kids. And my 19 yr old uncle was the after school babysitter. He sexually abused me for a few years and it was confusing and chaotic.
The lucky thing is that the harsh aspects were only coming from Jupiter and Mercury. So it was not as harsh or malefic as it could have become. WE only lived there until I was 8 and we luckily moved when my mom happily married a great man.
So the grand cross in my chart is not really a full cross because the 4th point is the North Node in Aquarius in the 10th.
Natal Degrees:
Pluto=23Leo02 BLM=23Leo15 [mean BLM]
Asc=21Tau21 Jupiter 17Tau56
Mercury=18Sco50 /Desc 21Sco21
North Node=18AQ28 [10th]
T-SQUARE TO PLUTO/BLM/SO NODE FROM THE JUPITER/ASC TO MERCURY/DESC OPPOSITION.
"Part of the fixed cross is Taurus. Jupiter was in it and formed part of a fixed grand cross. Jupiter is one's belief patterns, and Taurus is the sign which would seek physical tangibility of whatever was felt to be so. BML cannot provide that, as it is a purely inner experience that the person simply believes/understands/acknowledges to always have been there, and to be true without knowing why (Pluto). There may be a necessity to overcome unwarranted fears in delving into the unknown to seek answers. "
Yes,^^^ to that. Jupiter on my ascendant and opposing Mercury in Scorpio, demanded that I try and 'make real' my beliefs and my metaphysical knowledge. [Pluto/So Node/4th]
When I first began studying Astrology, as a 13 yr old, I was using it to try and save myself from emotional turmoil. I really was looking for a life line, an explanation for the cosmic intensity I sensed all around me. Now I know it was a lot of inner turmoil, stemming from the sexual abuse etc.
But I felt like I was 'remembering' Astrology, not like I was learning it for the first time. And as I grew up, and was living in Berkeley, I was living among some very amazing healers, practitioners in the 70's.
You mentioned Rebirthing, and I did some awesome Rebirthing sessions and some Past Life Regressions. And I had vivid past life memories of studying planetary tables by candlelight, in past incarnations. So I felt like I was coming home, and it felt like a comfort to me.
"BML in 4th has also found associations with terminations of one kind or another, and the cravings, yearnings, and 'if only' that remain. In some cases it has been observed to represent the figment of imagination of 'the (lost) child that never was', yet who lives within to go through the inner created passage of growth that doesn't exist in reality."
YES, ^^^^, I had always seen BLM as being 'where you sacrifice, where you must give something up.' And in the 4th, conjunct my Pluto and South Node, I had interpreted it as sacrificing my familial connections, and my tight family bonds, for the search for my own individual identity and personal journey.
I was in fact, called lovingly 'the lost child', on the rare occasions that I made it back home to a family wedding or celebration. I was the outlier.
THANK YOU FOR THE LOOK AT MY 4TH HOUSE. Pretty dark and isolated down there...
