Neptune is absolutely wrecking me right now.

[sweetnovember]

I'm writing this post more as a way to document what I’m going through because it feels like I’m wading through a fog that I can’t seem to shake. Honestly, I always knew Neptune would have such a pronounced effect on me, but now that it's transiting past me, I have absolutely no idea what is going on.

What’s really surprising to me is that the exact conjunction with my Sun has already passed, and I barely noticed it. My life feels so off course. I used to be someone who had dreams and was actively working towards them. Those dreams are still there, but now I feel completely lost, like I’m stuck in a dark haze and can’t seem to find my way out.

I know this Neptune transit is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, and I was aware it would be deep, but it’s just so overwhelming. On the outside, my life appears to be in order, but inside, it’s chaotic. I’m still young, but I’m buried in debt, and it feels like I shouldn’t have to deal with these incredibly heavy burdens.
I do have some hope that there’s light at the end of the tunnel if I can just get through this. Some days more, but days like today, I feel completely helpless.

I honestly have no idea what I’m supposed to be gaining from this, but I’m holding on to the belief that one day I’ll feel free, grounded, and more like myself again. Right now, I’m not living in the real world—I’m stuck in my head, and I can’t seem to let go. The self-awareness is almost too much; I’m hyper-aware of how I feel, and it’s tearing me apart. I can’t stop obsessing over what I want to do with my life.

At this point, my only plan is to declare bankruptcy and save up until I can think clearly and figure out my next steps. I need to move somewhere and find my people. This is now how I am supposed to be living, I feel it deep in my soul.
Just to clarify, I am receiving mental health treatment, so that’s already in place. I've always been an extreme empath. - the kind of empath that feels EVERYTHING.
It's like i'm not just feeling my pain, I'm feeling the worlds pain. I feel like I'm carrying the world on my shoulders.

I guess I’m really just looking for someone to take a look at my chart and the current transits and maybe help me make sense of this agony I’m going through. Any insights or advice would be deeply appreciated.

Chart for those interested:

 

[katydid]

I'm writing this post more as a way to document what I’m going through because it feels like I’m wading through a fog that I can’t seem to shake. Honestly, I always knew Neptune would have such a pronounced effect on me, but now that it's transiting past me, I have absolutely no idea what is going on.

What’s really surprising to me is that the exact conjunction with my Sun has already passed, and I barely noticed it. My life feels so off course. I used to be someone who had dreams and was actively working towards them. Those dreams are still there, but now I feel completely lost, like I’m stuck in a dark haze and can’t seem to find my way out.

I know this Neptune transit is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, and I was aware it would be deep, but it’s just so overwhelming. On the outside, my life appears to be in order, but inside, it’s chaotic. I’m still young, but I’m buried in debt, and it feels like I shouldn’t have to deal with these incredibly heavy burdens.
I do have some hope that there’s light at the end of the tunnel if I can just get through this. Some days more, but days like today, I feel completely helpless.

I honestly have no idea what I’m supposed to be gaining from this, but I’m holding on to the belief that one day I’ll feel free, grounded, and more like myself again. Right now, I’m not living in the real world—I’m stuck in my head, and I can’t seem to let go. The self-awareness is almost too much; I’m hyper-aware of how I feel, and it’s tearing me apart. I can’t stop obsessing over what I want to do with my life.

At this point, my only plan is to declare bankruptcy and save up until I can think clearly and figure out my next steps. I need to move somewhere and find my people. This is now how I am supposed to be living, I feel it deep in my soul.
Just to clarify, I am receiving mental health treatment, so that’s already in place. I've always been an extreme empath. - the kind of empath that feels EVERYTHING.
It's like i'm not just feeling my pain, I'm feeling the worlds pain. I feel like I'm carrying the world on my shoulders.

I guess I’m really just looking for someone to take a look at my chart and the current transits and maybe help me make sense of this agony I’m going through. Any insights or advice would be deeply appreciated.

Chart for those interested:

Oh Wow, I see what you mean about being an Empath.

Sun@28 Pisces in 8th house, Neptune part of Air Grand Trine with Kite to Jupiter/Leo in 1st house. You are very much a psychic sponge and an antenna picking up all the vibrations.

I have always thought it was somewhat difficult to be a Pisces with Leo rising as those two energies or 'goals' are so different from each other. And now, with you having Neptune crossing your Sun, and about to back up over it and then station Direct on top of it at the end of this year, your Pisces energy is being so strongly emphasised.

And Saturn is on its way---so doing the bankruptcy is probably the right idea. Just get that out of the way and move forward when the coast clears. I know several people who have enhanced and bettered their lives after declaring bankruptcy and starting over. Of Course you have to make necessary changes to not get back in that vulnerable position again. I'm sure you will as Saturn opposed Pluto takes difficult lessons very seriously.

It seems from your Sat/Pluto opposition T-square to your Sun in the 8th, The bankruptcy is more about unlucky, difficult circumstances that made things impossible than it was about you being lazy or neglectful? Sometimes there are lessons which cannot be avoided and we learn them and move on.

When you have Tr Neptune going back and forth over your Pisces Sun it is going to be heartfelt and deeply emotional.

You also have Tr. Pluto opposed your Asc and conjunct your Descendant right now. I think that is putting more pressure on you and making your feelings and fears more intensified. Emotional Upheaval and Power Struggles ensue...

https://astromatrix.org/Horoscopes/Transit-Aspects/Pluto-Opposition-Natal-Ascendant
Pluto Opposition Natal Ascendant Meaning
During the time of Pluto opposing your natal Ascendant, you may experience profound shifts and transformations in various areas of your life. This powerful aspect symbolizes a period of intense personal growth and evolution. You might feel a strong pull towards exploring the depths of your psyche and confronting hidden aspects of yourself that have been buried beneath the surface.

As Pluto opposes your Ascendant, you may encounter external challenges that force you to confront your own power dynamics and relationships. This can lead to a deeper understanding of your own personal boundaries and a transformation of your self-image. You might find yourself questioning your role in relationships and evaluating whether they truly align with your authentic self.

This time also has the potential to bring financial changes into your life. The 2nd house represents money and values, and with Pluto opposing your Ascendant, you may find a need to reassess your relationship with material possessions and financial stability. This can involve a deep examination of your values and what truly brings you a sense of security and abundance.

Reflecting on this time, ask yourself: How can I harness the transformative power of this aspect to truly embrace my authentic self and create a life that aligns with my deepest values? How can I navigate the shifts in relationships and financial dynamics with grace and integrity? Embracing the intensity of this time can lead to powerful personal growth and a greater sense of alignment with your true purpose.

 

[FraterAC]

3/19/03, 19:37 UT ; 094W43, 39N02 correct?

 

[sweetnovember]

3/19/03, 19:37 UT ; 094W43, 39N02 correct?

Correct.

 

[FraterAC]

We are all subject to celestial influences, filtered and modified by those influences in effect at the moment of embodiment. Be that as it may, we must always remember that the mind is capable of using creative energies of similar vibratory rate and potency. In other words, we have the power to create mentally influences over our lives just as potent as planetary influences.

Although Transits are valid and meaningful, there are other influences as well, such as the various levels of progressions.

I see this as a time of deep personal transformation and regeneration for the native. The Secondary (aka Major) progressed Sun is trine natal Pluto (to 04’ of arc) indicating a three year period of contact with powerful hidden transformative energies. The Major progressed Sun is also trine Maj-prog Pluto (to 01’).

The Maj-prog Sun is also conjunct the trans-Neptunian object (minor planet) Eris (09’, separating). The positive effect of Eris seems to be to focus the individual on their own agenda or mission in life (“we must cultivate our [own] garden” as Voltaire said); the negative influence seems to be to create chaotic states, conflict, and individual alienation.

The effect of these two influences would be a thorough process of transformation of the native’s experience toward their true mission or place in life. That the aspect to Pluto is a trine, the most harmonious of aspects, indicates that this will ultimately be a positive experience.

The Minor progressed Sun is trine natal Uranus in Pisces in the 8th house (24’ separating). This also indicates transformation. Positive influences of Uranus incline altruism, intuition, originality, a progressive state of mind.

On 8/12/24 the Minor progressed Moon sextiles antiscion Pluto, which would time or reinforce the positive effects of the planet. Transiting Uranus is sextile natal Mercury (25’, separating) reinforcing the positive Uranus effect.

 

[Frisiangal]

I'm writing this post more as a way to document what I’m going through because it feels like I’m wading through a fog that I can’t seem to shake. Honestly, I always knew Neptune would have such a pronounced effect on me,

As a Pisces Sun-Mercury it's natural that you are more attuned to Neptunian energies than other signs will be. Yet you are only 21 years old (as can be seen from outer planetary positions in the natal chart. FraterAC could provide more accuracy).
It has been observed that, until maturity sets in at the Saturn return, young people are more guided by their Moon than Sun position, and it is the traditional rulerships of the sign that can have more influence in the young lives. It can be seen that there is an applying opposition from natal Jupiter in the 1st house to natal Neptune in the7th house. One might say that Jupiter exaggerates the influences of Neptune until the Sun has gained sufficient strength (Sun semi-square Neptune) to perceive life clearly. With natal Sun 'dragging' an obsessional square natal Pluto behind it, compulsions may be more evident in living in the 'other world dimensions' than using the rationality of an Earth sign that can provide some kind of groundedness. Sun forms a within orb Quintile to Chiron (inner wound pain of facing reality) in Capricorn (rationality towards physical manifestation), so time is being given to undergo the change required.

It is so unwise to treat Neptune as the planet that provides the fog of escaping and not dealing with reality. The individual does that him/herself. The gift of Neptune is that it simply shows what one is experiencing that is NOT real that one prefers to see, than what is when the fog is lifted. Neptune is there to help one to progress forward, not to hinder any attempts towards it. It can produce the positive gift of empathy; envisioning a truth behind what cannot be physically seen, only inwardly experienced. Yet is so different from what could be labelled 'mental instability'.

but now that it's transiting past me, I have absolutely no idea what is goin now I feel completely lost, like I’m stuck in a dark haze and can’t seem to find my way out.

Influence of transit Pluto opposing Leo Ascendant??

I know this Neptune transit is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, and I was aware it would be deep, but it’s just so overwhelming. On the outside, my life appears to be in order, but inside, it’s chaotic. I’m still young, but I’m buried in debt, and it feels like I shouldn’t have to deal with these incredibly heavy burdens.

Why not ?? How did the debts occur in the first place? Did you never envisage what would result if you lived beyond (Jupiter !) your physical means? Planetary symbolism shows how things are at any given time. It is completely neutral in the choices one makes to deal with them.

At this point, my only plan is to declare bankruptcy

Is that possible for one so young? Negative Pisces influence to play the victim, give up, and count the losses?

and save up until I can think clearly and figure out my next steps.

THAT is acting positively towards planetary influences in the chart via transits and the progressed techniques.

I need to move somewhere and find my people. This is now how I am supposed to be living, I feel it deep in my soul.
Just to clarify, I am receiving mental health treatment, so that’s already in place. I've always been an extreme empath. - the kind of empath that feels EVERYTHING.
It's like i'm not just feeling my pain, I'm feeling the worlds pain. I feel like I'm carrying the world on my shoulders.

I guess I’m really just looking for someone to take a look at my chart and the current transits and maybe help me make sense of this agony I’m going through. Any insights or advice would be deeply appreciated.

Your post reads as a victim who cannot make changes, and is more or less based upon 'what I feel'. Who is to say if its assumption is correct?
Maybe that is what transit Neptune to natal Sun is attempting to show you. That there IS another way in order that Sun's progressed position in Aries conjunct M.C. and natal aspects it makes (inner traits) can find the assertiveness to relinquish the experiences which appear to be working against you and begin acting towards and with those which can work FOR you..

The chart is shown through Whole Sign symbolism, which prevents any house realm insights from those astrologers who work with other house systems.

 

[FraterAC]

My understanding of Neptune is that it is the means of communication with inner realms of consciousness. The issue is that as the inner consciousness is stimulated (even subliminally), the outer is put in neutral, as it were. Like a scale, as one side goes up (the inner), the other goes down (the outer).
Since impressions from the inner realm have to make it through the subconscious mind to get to ordinary consciousness, there is a tendency for the signal to pick up random impressions and detritus from the subconscious, often getting considerably distorted.
Those with a strong Neptune influence have the challenge (or privilege) of learning to discern what they are getting, and how it can be constructively used.
Over the years many millions of people have been able to do just that.
Feat not, and don't despair. There is no reason why you can't do that as well. A fixed sign on the ascendant (especially Leo) gives the stability and will to prevail.
I imagine it goes without saying to avoid mind-altering substances as a general rule. They can be very counterproductive to the process of sorting out Neptune impressions.

 

[Blister]

My opinion of Neptune transits is that even if you don't do drugs, you feel like you're doing drugs.

 

[Nexus7]

It's not just Neptune over your Sun. It's the fact you are coming up to a transit Saturn square Saturn, and natally this forms a t-square with you Sun, Mercury and Pluto, transiting these planets first.

Everyone knows about the Saturn Return at about age 29, which most astrologers see as the rite of passage into 'true' adulthood. But I suspect that that first Saturn square át 21 can also be extremely tough for a young adult taking their first steps into adulthood, sometimes more challenging. And failure, as it will feel like, may well sometimes feel devastating! Plfo opposing Saturn is no walk in the park, the Co sequences of these failures will feel as though sentence has been passed, and the gallows are waiting!

Mercury square Saturn brings an inborn sensitivity to the opinions of others regarding your mental abilities, though when not under pressure you should make a thorough learner. And then you have mattsly Sun square Saturn, which I dictates that under the superficial Jupiter Ian self assuredness, there is the feeling of having something to prove.

Where is your father in all this? Was there someone you grew up with who could mentor you in the way you might have wished for? What about boyfriends? Are they there for you?

Neptune may be your Sun ruler, but my experience is that Neptune can really undermine the Sun, and any disappointment or let-down here will leave its mark. Or it could swing the other way, and lead to a narcisstic sense of being invincible, which you don't want either.

Some people say that in certain jobs one is given in the early 20's, it is a given that you will make mistakes and mess up: trial by ordeal, if you are in that sort of job. In other words, the only failure might be not to fail in the first place.

The observations then that you might have a Mikawber streak to bolster up illusions even as the bailiffs come k rocking may be apt, so maybe start looking for the places where you can get the best advice regarding your current difficulties. Saturn will be hitting your Sun too, but where you can face these difficulties head-on, at least you will be starting to adult sooner rather than later. In the mean time you Libra Moon could help you with self care, and weighing up the best of all your options.

 

[FraterAC]

For reference, the chart below presents the native's radical chart on the inner wheel, the antiscion positions of the planets on the middle wheel, and the Secondary/Major progressed planets as of 08/12/24 on the outer wheel.
The progressions are Bija-corrected.

 

[sweetnovember]

As a Pisces Sun-Mercury it's natural that you are more attuned to Neptunian energies than other signs will be. Yet you are only 21 years old (as can be seen from outer planetary positions in the natal chart. FraterAC could provide more accuracy).
It has been observed that, until maturity sets in at the Saturn return, young people are more guided by their Moon than Sun position, and it is the traditional rulerships of the sign that can have more influence in the young lives. It can be seen that there is an applying opposition from natal Jupiter in the 1st house to natal Neptune in the7th house. One might say that Jupiter exaggerates the influences of Neptune until the Sun has gained sufficient strength (Sun semi-square Neptune) to perceive life clearly. With natal Sun 'dragging' an obsessional square natal Pluto behind it, compulsions may be more evident in living in the 'other world dimensions' than using the rationality of an Earth sign that can provide some kind of groundedness. Sun forms a within orb Quintile to Chiron (inner wound pain of facing reality) in Capricorn (rationality towards physical manifestation), so time is being given to undergo the change required.

It is so unwise to treat Neptune as the planet that provides the fog of escaping and not dealing with reality. The individual does that him/herself. The gift of Neptune is that it simply shows what one is experiencing that is NOT real that one prefers to see, than what is when the fog is lifted. Neptune is there to help one to progress forward, not to hinder any attempts towards it. It can produce the positive gift of empathy; envisioning a truth behind what cannot be physically seen, only inwardly experienced. Yet is so different from what could be labelled 'mental instability'.

Influence of transit Pluto opposing Leo Ascendant??

Why not ?? How did the debts occur in the first place? Did you never envisage what would result if you lived beyond (Jupiter !) your physical means? Planetary symbolism shows how things are at any given time. It is completely neutral in the choices one makes to deal with them.


Is that possible for one so young? Negative Pisces influence to play the victim, give up, and count the losses?

THAT is acting positively towards planetary influences in the chart via transits and the progressed techniques.



Your post reads as a victim who cannot make changes, and is more or less based upon 'what I feel'. Who is to say if its assumption is correct?
Maybe that is what transit Neptune to natal Sun is attempting to show you. That there IS another way in order that Sun's progressed position in Aries conjunct M.C. and natal aspects it makes (inner traits) can find the assertiveness to relinquish the experiences which appear to be working against you and begin acting towards and with those which can work FOR you..

The chart is shown through Whole Sign symbolism, which prevents any house realm insights from those astrologers who work with other house systems.

Should I instead try being happy go lucky and put on rose colored glasses so I can shut off the victim part of me? I know what I’m missing in this world yet I’m cut off from it.

You’ve clearly seen my chart. With my Moon right on the IC and my progressed moon passing a square across it now, you got it, I’m definitely an emotional wreck and definitely coming across as the victim here. I also wrote I was writing this to document what it feels like, so that if anyone else goes through a transit this intensely, it is OKAY to feel like a victim. You just have to work with the energy

 

[Blister]

For some leveling....
Wrecking as in ship wrecked or run-aground?
Or, wrecking as in a Mars shooter or chaser that you didn't figure into the mix?

 

[FraterAC]

With my Moon right on the IC and my progressed moon passing a square across it now

The closest aspect the Major progressed Moon is making right now is a sextile to antiscion Jupiter (22' of arc). The progressed Moon is more than 4 degrees (4:05) past the square to the MC/IC axis -- far out of orb.
It is definitely OK to experience whatever one is experiencing. However, one's attitude is always essential to one's experience and outcomes.

 

[FraterAC]

My opinion of Neptune transits is that even if you don't do drugs, you feel like you're doing drugs.

I've had both experiences and by far drugs (and BTW, alcohol is a drug) are worse.

 

[FraterAC]

when my Sun crosses into and NN regresses to Taurus. That progressed new moon at 10deg Taurus, 11/26/2045.

These influences are years in the future. Neither will dramatically change the native's experience, like flipping on a light switch. Neither will do anything without action on the native's part. The stars will not deliver anything to the native of themselves. Do not wait a decade for conditions to change.
Live In The Present!
Opportunities exist right now, today. In this hour.
Use the creative power of the mind to create the experience that is desired. Hold the desired outcome in the mind and do not be swayed from it. Refuse to accept obstacles or victimhood.
All change in circumstances must start from within.

 

[Frisiangal]

Should I instead try being happy go lucky and put on rose colored glasses so I can shut off the victim part of me? I know what I’m missing in this world yet I’m cut off from it.

It is Libra that wears 'the rose-coloured glasses'. The Moon in Libra forms an Air grand trine with Venus and Saturn. It's already a conditioned, inherent part of character. It's the square to Mars-Chiron in Capricorn that conflicts with it in order to show that what's in the mind may not agree with what actually manifests in reality. With MEAN Black Moon Lilith in Taurus, practicality, through choice, may not exist for you. It is for you to decide whether and when the occasions arise to keep the glasses on, or take them off.

You’ve clearly seen my chart. With my Moon right on the IC and my progressed moon passing a square across it now, you got it, I’m definitely an emotional wreck and definitely coming across as the victim here. I also wrote I was writing this to document what it feels like, so that if anyone else goes through a transit this intensely, it is OKAY to feel like a victim. You just have to work with the energy

Hopefully, the PIsces quality of being able to see through the fog to reach the ultimate truth will become 'the saviour' that rescues the victim from any self-imposed martyrdom.

 

[StarchaserNancy]

Living in the present is important as the above poster said. W/ Neptune, anxiety and fear can easily take over. Mind/body is so sensitive to the outer world and it's difficult to stay present and here. Ground yourself w/ exercise daily if you can, too.