Scorpios and the psychology of revenge

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I am Plutonian and very heavy Scorpio.

I will use your weakness againt u. If u have confided anything in me that can be used againt u I will use it back against u. BUT, that is only if u do me wrong. I am a loyal friend.

Also, I like to sit back and watch. As one said it's one style. As, with my exhusband. He did me sooo bad and wrong, but I have patience. He is Scorpio but not the heightened kind. He is the lowly kind. I told him this will catch up to u, wait and see. He never liked children. Never cared about being married. He got his now wife pregnant while we were separated. He had to give me full and total custody of my daughter who is now grown. Her 3 children came to live with them along with the one they had together. Her oldest son got his girlfried pregnant and now him and his girlfriend and their baby lives with him along with all the others. lol Plus, his daughter won't have anything to do with him at all and to top it off. He has a fleash eating disease in his leg that started with ulcers. He has had several surgeries and a skin graft that didn't take.

I either love u or hate u. It doesn't matter to me which. Just don't do me wrong.
 
To be just fair and just to ourselves, to overcome the insecurity in us,

We can't just let something or someone attacked or hurt us down and get away with it. It will always remain a shadow in our lives - like something or someone can always come and step on top of our heads, always had a hold over us , and like we anytime can be at mercy of something or someone.

No way we can live with that, we had to conquer our fears and enemies.
We can't be weak, if not, how are we going to protect and care for our love ones.
 
deanna said:
What is your definition of revenge?
Retribution. A wrong being righted. Basically, It's correcting the actions of something that was done against you.

deanna said:
When is revenge appropriate/necessary?
That's a very open question..
For me, at least, revenge is neccessary when the only thing I can think about is how I've been wronged. It's like an obsession, and eventually release is needed.

deanna said:
When is revenge not appropriate/necessary?
When they're sorry. When they understand what they've done and how it affected the other person.

deanna said:
What do you think should be to the end result of revenge? What is the goal?
I could say it's about righting a wrong, but for me, it's honestly not. If I ever driven to revenge, it's for my own happiness..Knowing someone got what they deserved...

deanna said:
Other thoughts or input on the subject of revenge?
Scorpios aren't the only revengeful sign...Just stating the obvious...
 
I like this thread, but something bothers me about the subject of revenge the way how you describe them yourselves. Now, I personally don't feel all Scorpios think revenge is something they'd do. Kids can get away with that kind of stuff but for adults? Doesn't it seem childish or laughable to get revenge on someone?

I'm talking about stuff that could do without revenge if you just tried not to pull out the revenge card. I have this crazy, crazy exfriend who won't let go of something she holds me accountable for something that happened nearly a decade ago, a time where youth lessons needed to be learned through experience. I mean she made me feel very bad about what I've done but I've forgiven myself for it and regretted it terribly. She never has, but, she seems like a decent person, which is why *I* don't wish to dish it back out to her. I've owned up to that responsibility, which is why I never considered myself guilty for what I've done, but she doesn't get it to her head.

I don't care if she's got Scorpio all over her body. She's like a little girl acting big girl and it's amusing to me because she's older than me. Supposedly a lot more "acknowledged" and "wiser" too. It's not that I am afraid of her or her scare tactics, but it gets to a point where I feel she's just acting immature and childish and that is a big problem for her, where revenge takes revenge on her instead of the person who she wants to attack. And it gets so painfully obvious that revenge never accomplished her anything.

So how about, have you ever considered being merciful or forgiving/turning the other cheek to the person who wronged you? Dear Scorpio-ladened angels, devils? :)


(I only have Saturn, Pluto, South node in Scorpio)
 
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laliqueviolin said:
So how about, have you ever considered being merciful or forgiving/turning the other cheek to the person who wronged you? Dear Scorpio-ladened angels, devils? :)


(I only have Saturn, Pluto, South node in Scorpio)
Absolutely. (Mercury/Mars in Scorpio).

But I will never allow myself to become a victim.

There is a VERY fine line between forgiving and being abused!
 
deanna wrote:
What is your definition of revenge?

I define the word as making others feel exactly how they have made us feel.

When is revenge appropriate/necessary?
When is revenge not appropriate/necessary?

I don't think there is a time when revenge or any other negative feeling is appropriate or necessary, but it's also true that there are people who won't learn to feel compassion if they don't experience the same pain they have inflicted on others. In those cases, I don't consider a little push to someone's karma too bad, especially if the damage they have done has been too much. It could even be healthy sometimes.:rolleyes: I guess this leaves me with the "revenge" trait still alive in my Scorpionic personality, even if my acting now is more along the lines of "noblesse oblige", and so I just let it pass.;)

What do you think shoud be to the end result of revenge? What is the goal?

Well, revenge is always about "balancing the books", so the ultimate result should be a feeling of justice having been well served.

Other thoughts or input on the subject of revenge?

I think revenge is given more importance in childhood and youth. It's like reaffirming one's personality, I guess. Also the meaning changes as one grows. When a kid feels agression coming from another kid, there is an almost automatic agressive reaction in most cases, that is taken as "self protection".

I was, especially during my teen years, very prone to vengeful feelings, which I have always thought were, in my case at least, born out of a deep sense of justice more than of only that nasty scorpio trait. I would get even in an impulsive way, as youngsters usually do. But I didn't called it revenge. It was justice.:D

I cannot say that I am a fan of revenge now. I have tried to get rid of the bad traits of my sign, since that is what we are supossed to do if we are pursuing spiritual growth, and I have learned that sooner or later people will pay for the bad deeds they do.

I heard a line in a movie once, that said that "revenge was a dish that tasted better when served cold". I totally agreed with it and made it mine, but not to apply it in its real meaning, as to be more effective with my revenge by acting with a cold head and a cold heart, but using it instead as a trick to allow myself to cool off by procrastinating when my entire being claims for pay back time. By acting in this way, I think I fulfill my goal of keeping harmony and peace, and so, creating positive energy. As we are only human beings, we may need to resort to tricks like this sometimes.;)


Carole
 
Carole said:
I think revenge is given more importance in childhood and youth. It's like reaffirming one's personality, I guess. Also the meaning changes as one grows. When a kid feels agression coming from another kid, there is an almost automatic agressive reaction in most cases, that is taken as "self protection".
That's a good point. I think when we are young, we feel that we have to personally "even the score". It may be an immediate reaction, instant anger/rage, or it may be a simmering resentment that sooner or later gets loose as we "just can't help ourselves".

I think experience teaches us how many times people get exactly what they deserve without any action on our part (those who believe in karma believe this always happens,) but if we take "joy in revenge", we poison ourselves and have to suffer for the damage we create within ourselves.
 
I've enjoyed this post and have learned a great deal here. My b/f who is scorpio has said many of times that he gets afraid of forgiving - that he worries that if he forgives someone that some how he is excusing their behavior and letting them feel they can do it again.. So many of the responses that Gaer has given has really helped..because I see these things in my boyfriend. If I hurt him or we have an arguement.. he will use my most painful things that he knows I fear or feel bad over and throw it in my face with utter cruetly to do nothing more than to cause me pain and anguish..he says sorry later..but just wanted to share with other scorpios out there.. if you keep doing that to someone over and over and over again.. you kill their love for you slowly..I respect you want others to feel what you feel.. and if I hurt him.. it's on me.. but I will say if he did nothing but show me love I would be the one to feel like a jerk once I stepped away from my behavior.. and be the one apologizing..but when he sinks to really low low levels of painful words and being cruel.. no matter if I was wrong.. he is the one that has to come back and say he is sorry if he wants me to stay..and that is sad..but it's true.. I think he said something recently that was really wise and showed his scorpio maturing.. he said that sometimes it's hard to forgive but when you do forgive you have let it go.. that the only person that is losing sleep over it is the one that hasn't let go or forgiven.
 
VenusInAries said:
I've enjoyed this post and have learned a great deal here. My b/f who is scorpio has said many of times that he gets afraid of forgiving - that he worries that if he forgives someone that some how he is excusing their behavior and letting them feel they can do it again.. So many of the responses that Gaer has given has really helped..because I see these things in my boyfriend. If I hurt him or we have an arguement.. he will use my most painful things that he knows I fear or feel bad over and throw it in my face with utter cruetly to do nothing more than to cause me pain and anguish..he says sorry later..
OUCH, OUCH!!!

I could gut people with what I know, a combination of watching, listening and mentally taking notes. But when I do this, it poisons me. I think the figurative "sting" of the Scorpion is often more like the stinger on the kind of bee that kills itself by stinging. If you know what I mean.

But it's a slow death. I have found absolutely nothing sweet about revenge, either fast or slow.

I will use what I know to fight back though if I feel I must, especially if I see someone I perceive as weaker being bullied. But that falls under the heading of "fairness" for me, so I suppose what I'm talking about is a blending of Libra and Scorp, with Pluto also strong in my chart, for those who link it to Scorpio. (I do at least as co-ruler.)
but just wanted to share with other scorpios out there.. if you keep doing that to someone over and over and over again.. you kill their love for you slowly..
ABSOLUTELY! For instance, I just happen to think my wife is the best person I've ever met in my life, and I would NEVER attack her in any way. I might be too harsh with my words when I get angry or frustrated, but mostly I just fume and get over it. So many things when said are things you never can take back.
he said that sometimes it's hard to forgive but when you do forgive you have let it go.. that the only person that is losing sleep over it is the one that hasn't let go or forgiven.
Ah, wise words, wise words. :)
 
I have a heavy scorpionic influence in my chart. Scorpio Ascendant with Uranus conjunct in house 12. I also have pluto sextile my moon while squaring mars, merc, and sun. So I can be very scorpionic.

Revenge is best served cold. But vengeance is mine saith the Lord.

I always look at karma. I won't lie, I don't forget ANYTHING someone's done. I will hold something in for a year. My biggest problem is letting go. However, I am more in tune with how karma affects the other person when I am wronged. So I defer my own personal revenge while knowing that the person will usually get what is coming to them in some way. So I just wait and watch, and get a sense of justice when I see what happens. Sometimes my venus in pisces feels a little sorry for the person/empathizes, but in the end I look at how they caused their own suffering.
 
gaer said:
I have to ask you and other people here a very important question: What is "a Scorpio"?

If you are going by Sun-sign astrology, that means that you have Sun in Scorpio.

But you could also be talking about Scorpio Moon, Scorpio ascendant, or several planets in Scorpio. :)


I didn't mean to put a sad face when I said I am a scorpio lol.:D
What is a scorpio? When you have sun in scorpio, sun is life force. But when you have loads of planets in scorpio, or scorpio asc/moon then you certainly feel the pluto influence, like it or not lol.
 
Erickaf said:
I didn't mean to put a sad face when I said I am a scorpio lol.:D
What is a scorpio? When you have sun in scorpio, sun is life force. But when you have loads of planets in scorpio, or scorpio asc/moon then you certainly feel the pluto influence, like it or not lol.
That was actually my point.

I know someone with Sun in Aries conjunct Jupiter in Aries who is the least Arian person I've ever known.

Those planets are locked up in the 12th, Saturn is "heavy" in the chart, Cancer Moon, Taurus rising.

On the other hand, Einstein, Sun in Pisces, had Saturn, Merc and Venus in Aries, plus Moon in Sag.

I'm right in the middle of a very detailed biography of him. Everything about him, almost, was defiant, original, rebellious, etc.

So I don't put too much important on Sun alone. That was my only point. :)

Gaer
 
Ahh gut is a good word Gaer..and it's wise you perceive the hurt and power of your words over others especially the ones you love.

You know I don't want my pisces moon to be acting like a victim here.. when he attacks me so viciously I will say I am usually doing something to hurt him in my own way. I have Sun in Taurus in the 7th but a lot of astrologers see it in the 8th because it's so close..19 Taurus..22 degrees Taurus on the 8th house cusp..so perhaps that colors my sun a little with 8th house traits..I also have Merc in Gem in the 8th..Neptune in Scorp..so unsure what it is in me but I can be mean.. I do have that Merc in gem in the 8th house oppose mars in sag.. I will say I can cut people pretty deep verbally..

So I think when he gets so vicious it's almost like a lesson.. if I'm gonna play with the big boys kind of thing.. when Memento said
memento mori said:
it's that saying "dont wound the king if u cant kill him"....

I see that with the cruelty game we play.. I lash out and say painful things.. (wound the king) but I cannot kill him.. so he teaches me a lesson on how to hurt someone..

My Aunt had heavy Cap and Scorp in her chart.. she always told me ..(regarding the abuse in my life) never forget and never forgive.. She died at age 33yrs old of cancer of the bone that ate her insides up.. I always wondered if it was metophoric of all the stuff she never let go of inside.. and I mean no disrespect to anyone that has lost a loved one to cancer by that.. only a thought I always had over how she would hold on to every hurt anyone caused her and never forgave.
 
VenusInAries said:
Ahh gut is a good word Gaer..and it's wise you perceive the hurt and power of your words over others especially the ones you love.
I would have been much wiser if I had learned that lesson before age 30!

I'm very intelligent. There. I said it. But why?

Because intelligence is WORTHLESS without wisdom, and it took a lot of my life to learn, the hard way, that being smart, being right is nothing if it isn't accompanied by kindness and compassion. :)

G.
 
Gaer that's the best thing I've heard in awhile.. gonna be thinking of that for awhile..because that is a great deal of truth there..
 
VenusInAries said:
Gaer that's the best thing I've heard in awhile.. gonna be thinking of that for awhile..because that is a great deal of truth there..
All learned that hard way, on my part. I'm VERY hard-headed. ;)
 
gaer said:
I would have been much wiser if I had learned that lesson before age 30!

I'm very intelligent. There. I said it. But why?

Because intelligence is WORTHLESS without wisdom, and it took a lot of my life to learn, the hard way, that being smart, being right is nothing if it isn't accompanied by kindness and compassion. :)

G.

Spot on Gaer! I am 29 and think I am finally getting a handle on things....slowly though!
I have Sun, Mars, Mercury, Venus & Uranus in Scorpio. I used to get very angry at people whom I felt did me wrong in some way. I realise that my anger was due my own insecurites and need to control.
I am a much happier person these days. In the past, there was a lot of internal stuff that I was not dealing with.
Feeling vengeful and angry is not fun. I'd rather forgive and realise that other people's hurtful behaviour reflects the pain that they feel inside, this realisation allows compassion to arise. When one is in pain, it is very easy to project our own negative feelings and traits onto others.
We are all swimming in the sea of life together! Let's all try to live in harmony with each other and forgive ourselves and others for being less than perfect. Focusing on progress not perfection is the best attitude to take I have found.
 
Lotus said:
Spot on Gaer! I am 29 and think I am finally getting a handle on things....slowly though!
I have Sun, Mars, Mercury, Venus & Uranus in Scorpio. I used to get very angry at people whom I felt did me wrong in some way. I realise that my anger was due my own insecurites and need to control.
I am a much happier person these days. In the past, there was a lot of internal stuff that I was not dealing with.
Feeling vengeful and angry is not fun. I'd rather forgive and realise that other people's hurtful behaviour reflects the pain that they feel inside, this realisation allows compassion to arise. When one is in pain, it is very easy to project our own negative feelings and traits onto others.
We are all swimming in the sea of life together! Let's all try to live in harmony with each other and forgive ourselves and others for being less than perfect. Focusing on progress not perfection is the best attitude to take I have found.

Very wise.
 
I agree with the idea of being compassionate and to understand the own problems of the agressor.
But until a certain level.
Then we should balance the times we look into the another person and instead of attacking him/her back, try to fix things by resolving them through dialogue; and the times we just give back the agression.
 
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