Why im a person that afraid,what reason causes fear to me?

[Fireboy]

Im afraid in my life to do things or moves,why,what causes me the fear?

 

[virgo18]

I dont see a reason. Your mars is exalted, moon in aries, jupiter in domicile.


The problematic aspects I see are:
Moon in the 8th square Mars exalted is a bossy mother perhaps control freak. Ups and downs in her humor.

Mercury square Neptune causes confusion in the way you think. You may live in a dreamy world at times, Or think you are doing something but you aren't doing anything significative. Perhaps lack of confidence to express your opinions verbally.

Sun square Neptune denotes a lack of confidence in your ego.

This indicates tendencies of psychologically based inhibitions, restrictions and frustrations which pose considerable challenges that need overcoming before the more positive characteristics of Neptune and the Sun emerge.

[from http://www.strangehouse.com/natal-aspects/sun-square-neptune.html - Moderator]

Venus in exile conjunct Pluto suggest you have to learn to love your self to be loved by other people. Maybe you make love mistakes in past lives and now you have to cut out that karma. But you may start loving your self first.
Because of you get a parter when you haven't healed that part of you, you can destroy the relationship because of your great need to have the love that you can give to your own self.

Chiron-Sun square also denotes very low self acceptance and self worth.


But this were the aspects that aren't so good in your chart. With your moon in aries, mars exalted, jupiter in domicile, sun square uranus, and venus in scorpio(learning to use it well AFTER you healed your self) you can achieve whatever you want to.

Maybe some hypnosis can help.

 

[miquar]

Hi Fireboy. Perhaps it is to do with the Moon in Aries in the 8th house square Mars (with both aspecting Chiron (10th house) and Uranus), and also to some extent perhaps Venus in Scorpio conjunct Pluto. My guess is that your relationship with your Mother didn't help you to feel safe and secure. She was probably emotionally very turbulent. The Virgo part of you needs life to run smoothly and efficiently - it fears chaos and disruption. You may be afraid to change your routine in case you are thrown back into the intense anxiety you may have felt as an infant due to your Mother's behaviour.

Your father may have been quite aloof and unsupportive (Saturn and Uranus in the 4th, Sun square Uranus and Neptune), and so may not have provided a Solar role model of your inner strength. In fact he may have been quite critical of you, resulting in you having little confidence in yourself (Sun in Virgo, Saturn in 4th square ascendant.)

You might benefit from exploring the feelings being carried by your inner child. It might also help you to make gradual changes to your routine rather than drastic ones at first. Much healing might come from applying yourself to the learning of a practical skill, and from looking carefully at your day-to-day life to see where you are being true to yourself and where you are polluting your true essence with irrelevant or harmful practises.

Don't know if this will help, but am grateful for any feedback either way.

 

[miquar]

Hi Virgo 18. I was writing my post while yours went on. Yes, I missed the possible significance of the chart ruling Mercury in Libra square Neptune. An idealistic Mercury with which to follow that Virgo path, but also unsure and fearing being cast out.

 

[virgo18]

Hi Virgo 18. I was writing my post while yours went on. Yes, I missed the possible significance of the chart ruling Mercury in Libra square Neptune. An idealistic Mercury with which to follow that Virgo path, but also unsure and fearing being cast out.

yeah also check that he has Chiron square sun thats not good

 

[miquar]

Yes, I imagine that strengthening the Sun could be the important thing to do first, so that there is a solid place from which to explore the Lunar issues.

 

[virgo18]

change yourself, and outer things will changes radically. Stop doing things you've been doing all this time. Start doing things you have not done before. Everything changes radically when you change, become a new person and you will be surprised.
You must never wait for others to change.

osho..................

 

[Fireboy]

Ty for answers,was helpfull,well,its true there is a problem with lack of confidence ,i have some bad feelings generally for my self,as miquar said,the relationship with mother & father isnt that good,we have often conflicts,they want to help me i suppose but maybe they dont know the right way,also its true as virgo said,i dont love my self,i have the opinion that the other ppl see me and they think im...somehow...curious guy.


When im saying i have fear or im afraid to do things,thats has to do with the fear of failure,a future failure,the fear of the unknown,you know "if i'll do this and dont make it?,if i'll accept that job and they dont like me?",i dont believe if i will start something i will make success,dont trust my self,i have difficulty of take a serious decision,the decision to change an attitude,a routine etc.

And what im wondering & want hear your opinion for that, its when this situation will end,i will have to wait until 2012 or more,the probabilities for improvement are still far?The basic aspects of my life can i hope will go better or must be prepared for more conflicts,more bad feelings,i want to take a happy sometime you know,believe me,its more than six years im facing that kind of fears.

 

[Fireboy]

Νo response?

 

[astrologer50]

Ty for answers,was helpfull,well,its true there is a problem with lack of confidence ,i have some bad feelings generally for my self,as miquar said,the relationship with mother & father isnt that good,we have often conflicts,they want to help me i suppose but maybe they dont know the right way,also its true as virgo said,i dont love my self,i have the opinion that the other ppl see me and they think im...somehow...curious guy.


When im saying i have fear or im afraid to do things,thats has to do with the fear of failure,a future failure,the fear of the unknown,you know "if i'll do this and dont make it?,if i'll accept that job and they dont like me?",i dont believe if i will start something i will make success,dont trust my self,i have difficulty of take a serious decision,the decision to change an attitude,a routine etc.

And what im wondering & want hear your opinion for that, its when this situation will end,i will have to wait until 2012 or more,the probabilities for improvement are still far?The basic aspects of my life can i hope will go better or must be prepared for more conflicts,more bad feelings,i want to take a happy sometime you know,believe me,its more than six years im facing that kind of fears.

your communications chart ruler mercury is a singleton ie: only planet in air element, which tends to make someone come out with 'sweeping statement syndrome' with not enough thought behind speech. Your mercury only has two aspects, the square to neptune is malific, causing too much daydreaming, fantasising, confusions,illusions. great for creative writing but much mis-communications, reading too much between the lines. Deception of self and/or others...

Virgo Asc can be quite shy, retiring and 8 out of 10 planets below the horizon suggests much introversion personality. Jupier retrograde (going backwards) suggests less need for socialising is needed and an inner confidence, given time, maturity and life experiences..

mars sextile jupiter shows confidence (with bit of effort) in 5th nad 7th house matters ie: relationships, love affairs and recreational matters.

Saturn square Asc is knocking your confidence. Sun is afflicted with square to saturn (lack of rapport with father) and sun square neptune, gives no clear self image, particularly noticed in teenage years and can cause an identity crisis..

chiron in gemini can suggests wounds received from siblings and square to sun shows problems with father and beliefs/values (2nd house)

North Node conj Moon in 8th house shows where you learning Lessons are in this lifetime. So mother/women will show you emotionally how to transform your life through *others' beliefs/values and joint finances* as opposed to your own in 2nd

I notice T Saturn has been conj natal mercury, which will set off mercury aspects, thereby T Saturn has been square to neptune. This is a classic depression aspect. this should be off now. Saturn going through 2nd house is *testing what is value to you* with regards to 2nd house matteris ie: how you earn your money and spend, personal self worth issues, belief systems and what you own materially and how that makes you feel connected to self worth issues...

When im saying i have fear or im afraid to do things,thats has to do with the fear of failure,a future failure,the fear of the unknown,you know "if i'll do this and dont make it?,if i'll accept that job and they dont like me?",i dont believe if i will start something i will make success,dont trust my self,i have difficulty of take a serious decision,the decision to change an attitude,a routine etc.

T Saturn has been doing this for you unfortunately..

 

[miquar]

Hi Fireboy. Sorry thread slipped by somehow. I don't know what else to add to what astrologer50 just said and what Virgo18 and I have put in previous posts.

With regard to your question about timing, if you have problems, as reflected in difficult chart placements, it won't necessarily be enough to wait for a happy transit. Freeing oneself from difficult issues is something that can be often be done more effectively during difficult transits. If you've experienced these problems more acutely during the last 6 years, then whichever transit or progression reflected the onset of the increased difficulty has probably finished by now. So this could be a part of you that you cannot just sit out.

Do you want to say something about what was happening for you at the time your issues became more acute, and how these issues manifested before that time (including as a child)? And could you give an example of how your anxiety has prevented you from doing/enjoying something recently?

 

[Christoph K.]

Hi Fireboy,


I know by experience that a virgo-ascendent offers quite some challenge. I read about "the typical" virgo ascendent being "afraid of being in the world" and my personal experience supports this information. It's like you not only tend to stay in your comfort zone, it's more like you are afraid to move at all for actions cause reactions and resonance and so you could encounter the parts of yourself you try to avoid facing in the outer world. The open world acts like a mirror four yourself. It's a place where you experience yourself by the reactions to your behavoir.

This fear is connected to your projections but as long as you don't face the matters you projects you won't be able to see behind them.

There's a nice song by The Dave Matthews Band related to this kind of problem ... "You Might Die Trying" ;-) Just try to think of this fear as being completly unproductive. There's no point in following this impulse. Try get out of your comfort zone.

 

[Fireboy]

Do you want to say something about what was happening for you at the time your issues became more acute, and how these issues manifested before that time (including as a child)? And could you give an example of how your anxiety has prevented you from doing/enjoying something recently?

Well,now,the situation for me is,full of loneliness and some bad feelings,i mean i never in my life had a friend or friends to enjoy some things,to talk about a problem or a happy moment,to laugh,the experience of a relationship,i never recieved love,i never lived the teenage student life as the most kids,so this important period for me passed away without any personal development,personal improvement,experiences,imagine a person in the age/period of 15-23 yo who is closed in his self,ashamed,distant,feels absolutely alone,he thinks that the other ppl dont sympathize him,he cant feel happy even if he try to do happy things,etc stuff.Its not the best thing when you have spent 6-7-8 years of not doing,living,almost nothing,and you are doing comparisons with the other ppl around you for what they've done,what they've succeed.There is a big space between 15 yo up 23 yo,that was a critical period for my personal improvement,things gone all in the wrong way.


If you want an example,i can tell you this,this summer i did with my sister my first travel,in italy,i had a good time,was good to see another city,but you know what,after the travel,i had the same feeling as before,i wasnt happy at all,the dissapointmet was there and waited for me,the sadness,loneliness,despair too.


Today i noticed something else,maybe dont seem so important but anyway,i was looking some info for palmistry and i found this,the head line in our left hand had to do with the intellect and reasoning,beliefs, morals and general attitude toward life,if this line its broken,that means that you are inconsistent in the way you think and may have even suffered a nervous breakdown,broken head lines can show times of more severe mental problems.So,i noticed that mine head Line,yes,its broken in the middle,in two parts.

 

[astrologer50]

explaing things astrologically isn't unfortunately going to change your life YOU are. I strongly suggest you see your doctor - sounds like depression to me. this is a 'chemical imbalance' in your brain...

 

[miquar]

Hi Fireboy. I agree with Astrologer50. Articulating your situation through astrology may help in some ways, but you probably need ongoing therapy in which to explore and challenge the assumptions upon which your lonely and awkward reality has been built. I imagine that there is a certain amount of anger to come out - depression is often a sign of buried anger - because of that 8th house Aries Moon in hard aspect to Mars and Saturn and also aspecting Chiron - all close. This is something you could explore in the safe environment created by a good therapist, especially good for perhaps because of the Jupiter in Pisces in the 7th (relationship house) and Venus conjunct Pluto in Scorpio in the 3rd (communication house).

As transiting Saturn approaches opposition Moon, square Mars, and semisquare its natal position, this could be good time to face these issues and establish a program for liberating your healthy aggressive energy.

I hope you can find what you need.

 

[Fireboy]

Articulating your situation through astrology may help in some ways, but you probably need ongoing therapy in which to explore and challenge the assumptions upon which your lonely and awkward reality has been built.

This moment,there is no afford to visit a therapist,its not that you will go two or three times and you will find solution,may needed to go many times,seems expensive to me all this.On the other hand,i can try to find and go to a Public clinic,but i also dont know cause be ashamed of doing this step.

With astrology what im expecting of ,is if i can see the cause of my problems,to find the root of a problem and the time horizon wich will may find a solution or will continue to face them.Thats all,of course i'm not waiting ex.miquar to come here with a magic wand and solve all my problems of my life.

 

[Christoph K.]

With astrology what im expecting of ,is if i can see the cause of my problems,to find the root of a problem and the time horizon wich will may find a solution or will continue to face them.Thats all,of course i'm not waiting ex.miquar to come here with a magic wand and solve all my problems of my life.

I'm pretty sure that you won't succeed solving your problems with astrology. Explaining a problem astrologically you may find out which parts of your personality do not interact well with each other and where you're blocked. You may even find out which events in your life caused your problems. But solving these blockades needs therapy, there's almost no way a person which suffers from a bunch of neurosis can solve it him/herself. It's like the tool you try to use to solve your problems is broken due to your metal condition.

A lot of people don't understand this and so try to solve their problems a long time without results. Try to get help from a professional as soon as possible. It's bad to live in a country, where mental help costs a lot of money. But after all, if a good therapy solves your problems, it's maybe worth quite some money.

I wish you all the best for the challenge you'll have to face. But remember, if you really want to change the way you are you'll have to leave a lot of things behind. Good luck.

 

[miquar]

Hi Fireboy. I just had a look at your transits and progressions for the time when you said that your problems became more intense. About a month after your 15th birthday, your progressed Moon moved into Scorpio, which could reflect an intensification of any feelings that you cannot trust that the world will welcome and support you. Earlier in 2001, transiting Saturn settled into your 10th house for a few years after passing over your MC twice in 2000. But transits and progressions like these must have triggered something that was always very much a part of you, I would guess, because the problems have continued for such a long time.

At the moment, as transiting Chiron moves across your descendant (assuming accurate birth time) it will trigger the aspect pattern in your chart which I would guess is the main significator of the difficulties you've discussed on this thread: the pattern which involves Mars in Capricorn, Saturn in the 4th house, Moon (conjunct North Node) in Aries in the 8th, and the Ascendant all making hard aspects to one another (including a semisquare and a sesquiquadrate, which are very important when they combine with squares and oppositions), apart from there is no aspect within orb between Mars and ascendant using the birth time on your chart.

So transiting Chiron has become part of this pattern now for this year and next. Your progressed Sun has been also making hard aspects to the planets in this pattern since late 2008, and is now moving away from a square to natal Mars as this progression to the natal pattern comes to an end. Transiting Saturn joins in too between now and the end of October, perhaps marking this as a time to take concrete action to alter the ways the energies manifest in your life, but also perhaps intensifying your frustration at being oppressed by how things are currently.

Also aspecting both Mars and Moon in the birth chart is natal Chiron and Uranus.

As I've said in a previous post on this thread I think, this suggests that you have been experiencing a depression due to suppressed anger, the two being very closely related - I think it was Fritz Pearles who used to sometimes ask patients, 'Who are you depressed at?' Having turned in on itself, the anger could be manifesting as self-loathing, which, when projected outwards into the world becomes an expectation of being unacceptable to others. With your sense of potency and capacity to dare to excel severely inhibited, it would be no wonder that you fear that anything you try will come to nothing.

One of the things that Chiron seems to symbolise is the search for understanding spurred by crushed ideals of what life, and humanity, should be like compared to apparently random and cruel world to which we often bare witness. But the first step in understanding is to accept that whatever 'injustices' have hurt you cannot be undone, and to acknowledge the 'wounded animal' rage within. So this year and next are potentially a time of progress. But with Chiron moving into the 7th, there is, I think, a sense that forming a therapeutic relationship would make a difference.

Transiting Pluto is also sextiling your Pluto, adding to the sense that this could be a time of dredging up what is holding you back and clearing it away to some extent.

If you cannot find the strength to ask for help from the public clinic you mentioned, then you would be missing out on the possibility of forming a therapeutic relationship in which you could test and dismantle these expectations that you are carrying, and in which you can express your feelings in a safe place. If you chose to go it alone, then perhaps keeping a journal would be a good idea. Transiting Pluto is approaching a square to your natal Mercury, so your thoughts may be drawn down to the roots of your struggles. With transiting Uranus joining in too, you may get some important insights if you spend some time focusing your mind in this way. Or if you prefer you could write more creatively, or a mixture of both approaches.

From a brief look at transits and progressions for the next few years, I think it is likely that things will feel gradually lighter, with perhaps 2012 being markedly different, giving you the emotional breathing space to explore how you would like to interact with, and participate, in the world. There will be a lot of emphasis on your 2nd house Mercury, which rules your 2nd house Sun, due the transits of Uranus and Pluto, so perhaps you will come see how you can develop and use your craft skills and/or mental faculty. With Sun in Virgo, you always have something to gain by developing yourself as a craftsman in whatever way (and also in trying to keep a daily routine going in which you care for, and improve, your physical surroundings and your mind & body.) Perhaps a sport would be good, as it would involve learning a skill, and also giving an outlet to that Moon in Aries energy - probably a martial art would be very good for you. Ignore your self-doubt for once and go for it!

I don't know if any of this is useful, but due to the limitations of astrology, and my limitations as an astrologer, its the best I can do.

 

[Fireboy]

Happy Birthday to me.

 

[bittermoon]

Happy birthday, Fireboy!